Saltburn Subversives understand that the Department of the Ungulate Environment and Heritage is about to designate Skelton an 'Area of Outstanding Natural Bestiality.'
A spokesman from the Department said, "We've been meaning to make this award to this funny Skelton place for some time, in view of its reputation but we couldn't remember where it was. My assistant, Smallcreep says it might be up north somewhere. So there you are."
We understand that any proposed change or improvement to ungulates in the Parish of Brotton and Skelton will now be subject to the usual planning regulations.
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